Look for the Good: That One Guy You Can’t Stand

Tobias (David Cross) dresses up as a British n...

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Sometimes it’s hard for me to look for the good.  Especially with people who I do not like. Shocking right. Everyone has someone in their circle of influence that they just can’t stand.  I remember growing up there was this one kid in my high school that I just could not stand to be around and I don’t even know why.  There was just something about him.

Stop that line of thought immediately.  If there is someone you know who you don’t like stop and try to think about the good things about him or her.  I’ll give you an example from my own life.

When I was a roofer.  I had been there for a few months when this new guy started working there.  I didn’t like him right from the beginning.  I now know why I did but at the moment I didn’t know and I avoided him at all cost.  Lucky for me he didn’t give up.

Turns out he is one of the coolest guys out there. He would always chat it up with me.  He wanted to get to know me not to just work with but to hang out with me.  He would always ask about movies and TV shows and all this stuff I was into.  I was stubborn about being friends with him but he wore me down and now I count him as one of my best friends.  He has blessed my life incredible.  I call him my hermono because he’s from South America and because we both like Arrested Development.

Also, the thing I didn’t like about him at the beginning was just that he stood really close to me when he talked.  How petty am I?  I guess I used to have a really big personal bubble.  Now my bubble is directly related to the last thing you ate and whether you have tuna breath.

That’s kind of an easy example.  Maybe it’s something as simple as standing to close but maybe it’s something much more hurtful.  I’m not saying you have to be BFF with whoever it is that you can’t stand, I’m just saying that you shouldn’t dismiss them.  There may come a time when you have to work with that person.  In fact I would say there is a very good chance you will have to work with Mr. or Mrs. Annoying.  Maybe it’s just me but I always end up with the people I’ve already decided I didn’t like and I usually end up looking foolish because they have very redeemable qualities.

If you can find those good qualities and nurture them then maybe you can move from dislike, to tolerance, to like, to love, to eternal companion (that’s the path my parent’s relationship went).

Look for the good in other people.  It’s something I learned at church.

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