Advent Calendar: Bambi’s Crystal Ball

Day 5

I’m a little disappointed that door 5 is so close to the 4th door but I also don’t know why that disappoints me.

It may seem like there is nothing to say about door 5.  It looks like a door that has random half words on it.  But if you count the letters, including the ones that only show a portion of themselves on the front of door 5, it has 13 letters on it.  Those letters are AYSTILOCOLATA.  With those letters you can spell the following words:

  • CATALYST
  • SOCIAL
  • TOTALLY
  • TOOTSY
  • COAST
  • TOOLS
  • TASTY
  • SALTY
  • COOL
  • LOTTO
  • SCATT

Do you see what this is?  Do you see what the advent calendar has given me?  It is look into my future!

Catalyst is the name of the book I wrote for NaNoWriMo.  It’s totally going to turn social phenomenon (that’s a thing, right?), just like the film Tootsy.  The book will be so successful that after I get it published I will be able to coast through life.  It will be like I’ve won the lotto.  That is so cool.

The magic door 5 also hints at what’s inside.  Something tasty.  A chocolate that is strangely salty and which will eventually turn into scatt.

Awesome!

But that feeling of awesomeness has been destroyed by another awful chocolate picture that has nothing to do with Christmas.

Bambi is not a Christmas thing.  People get twitterpated in the spring time, not on December 5th.  Also who wants to relive the agony of Bambi’s mom’s death.  The holidays are supposed to be a happy time.  Way to bring up bad memories advent calendar.

They tried to save themselves by putting a bow on the young deer.  No good.  Bows go on top of the head. They way it is now it just looks like a poorly tied tie.

Also, chocolate makers, you are sending the wrong message.  It’s dangerous to dress up wild animals in people clothes.  Don’t do it.  No matter how much more it makes the animal look ready for Christmas.

A cougar with a santa hat will still bite your face off.

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